Blessed Christmas

I always loved Christmas! For me, it is the beginning of something Awesome (the Salvation plan) that Christ has for us. Skin update... It is still red, itchy and patchy. Fashion update... Still the usual jeans/ long pants with a blouse.

Still not brave enough to show the world my battle scars. It is hard. It is painful. Most of all, it is itchy. I am sure many eczema sufferers out there will know how I feel... The rest of the world will think I am strange and they will never understand no matter how much I try to explain. :(

There's gonna be a healing service at All Saint's Anglican Church on the 28th Dec at 9am. I don't know if I should go for it. Mom says I should pray about it...

I do wanna get healed. But a part of me feels that if eczema is what God gave me so that I could blog and reach out to other people for Him. Then I would 'bite the bullet' and live with it to the best I can depending on Him for strength. I don't wanna sugar coat it or elude people into thinking that a Christian life is easy and does not require commitment on their part....

I digressed a lot. Here's wishing you and your loved ones a Merry Christmas! May the love, joy & peace of Christ be with you and your loved ones always~

Dear Heavenly Father,
I thank You for sending your only beloved son on Earth many years ago to die for our sins. Father, I know that You loved each and everyone of us. Though I cannot understand why You may allow others to suffer more, I pray that You will give them the strength and courage to overcome it. Father, I pray that You will teach us to trust You when times get tough and to hold on to Your promise that You will never leave us nor forsake us and we can freely call upon Your name for help. Father, I know it is not a coincidence that this person is reading my blog. I pray that You will let them experience You and Your love. Help me not to itch so much.

In Jesus' name we pray,
Amen!

Xoxo
Eczema Beauty

Confessions of an Eczema Sufferer

I had one of the worse flare ups I had thus far. Last night slightly after midnight I felt so itchy. Practically like a 'crazy woman' as I had no control over the itch. It was just so itchy! After battling an itch that lasted for what seemed hours, it prompted me post the confessions on an eczema sufferer on my social networking site.

Confessions of an Eczema Sufferer
I wish I was normal. You have no idea how envious I am of people with normal skin. I wish I didn't inflict harm on my skin whenever I itch uncontrollably leaving (battle) scars. I wish I didn't have to feel embarrassed when people ask me what's wrong with my skin. Most of all, I wish there was a cure for eczema. And for all these reasons, I struggle. I struggle to love myself.

This is me. One of the many fighters against eczema.

I am normally so optimistic and I never really liked showing others my weakness. But i guess the flare up yesterday really humbled me. I mean normal people wouldn't understand what it was like to have eczema and I was crazy enough to want them to know what it was like. I am thankful for the support and encouragement coming in from my loved ones. Many of them reassured me of the healing that was on the way coming from God.

When I first started this blog, I was afraid. Afraid of what people would think. But I now understand that God planted the idea of creating this blog to write about my eczema journey for His glory. Today will be the day that I will be sharing the link of the blog with the public.

Dear Heavenly Father,
I just want to thank You for Your love and mercies towards me thus far. Thank you for sending people to remind me of Your love and to encourage me in this journey of faith. Father, I know there is a reason why you gave me eczema. The healing process is on its way and when it comes, it will bring glory to Your name. Father, I pray for courage and wisdom to care for my body in the way You would want me to. Father, I also commit other eczema fighters into Your hands. I pray for Your divine intervention and healing in Your time. I pray that whoever reads this blog will be blessed by You and go away experiencing Your love and peace. Thank You Father for you unending love and grace to me.
In Jesus' name we pray,
Amen!

Xoxo
Eczema beauty

Brokeness

Had a sudden flare up today after gym session. It was so itchy. I couldn't help but scratch and injure my skin. Normal people will never understand the trauma. They think eczema people want to scratch.  Correction, we can't help but scratch. In easier terms, we just can't help it. We're not like normal people.

I burst into tears. It's so hard. Where's the healing God promised?  I questioned. Why did God create me this way? Why can't I have normal skin? I have never had the courage to wear shorts or miniskirts for I have ugly skin. It's just so hard. I can't help but be envious of girls with flawless skin & limbs. I'm just this broken person with ugly skin...

Dear God,
I'm trying so hard to trust. I don't know what else to do anymore. The itch is just so unbearable. I know it is probably because of sin that i have to battle eczema. But Father, i believe and claim on the promise that Jesus died on the cross for me and His resurrection proves that He has overcome death. Eczema, pales in comparison and i believe that there is power in Jesus' name. Help me remember that. Heavenly Father,  I know at times I've disappointed You and I ask for forgiveness. Teach me to love you more so that I can love myself and then love others as well. Father,  I commit whoever reading this into Your loving arms. Grant them Your love & peace. Let them experience You personally.
In Jesus' name we pray,
Amen

Xoxo
Eczema Beauty

A milestone to recovery

Finally had the courage to go out today.  Actually i went back to college yesterday but I felt terrible. Like my self esteem was really low. My face was red and patchy. It didn't help that someone came up to me and asked me what's wrong. I mean. It's not her fault that she doesn't know what eczema is, I just felt really awkward about my skin condition. What hurts the most was when she said "oh, your skin normally isn't like this."

I just wanted to dig a hole in the ground to hide. Each day, or rather every night, I tell myself. "I believe God will heal me one day. He will heal me." I guess I just have to learn to trust.  Which is a very difficult thing when you're stuck in a painful situation.

The strange thing was He did speak to me through someone at a youth camp a few years back that He is going to heal me. I just don't know when.

This morning when I woke up, my face was not as red. I definitely have to give God glory for that! I believe God is in the midst of healing.  We just have to trust. I know satan wouldn't like this post or me at all as I am giving God glory. Nothing can snatch me from God's loving arms.

Dear Heavenly Father,
I just wanna thank You so much for calming my skin down. I know You are in the midst of healing me. I believe and I claim on Your promise. Father, I pray for the person reading my blog. They might be here as they are desperate to find healing or even they found this blog by accident. Father, I pray that You will touch their hearts and let them experience You personally. I know it's hard to trust but Father, I pray that You'll be merciful and Your holy spirit will touch their hearts. Thank You father for the opportunity to share Your love through this blog.
In Jesus' name.  Amen!

Xoxo

Eczema Beauty

Inspiration for this blog

My skin has been flaring up quite badly. My face, knees arms and back of legs has been really red and inflamed.I don't know if it is the weather. Or just my skin being angry... 

It started out because of the stress from the exams. Now they would't just go away. :( I have been so helpless the past few days. Sometimes I even cry seeing there isn't much I can do to actually get rid of eczema. This inspired me to create this blog to rant, or even to share my experiences. I know God is real. But sometimes, I can't help but wonder what is He up to? Or why does He not want to heal?

I will keep holding on. 

It is hard being an eczema being. I actually feel less than a human being. I really want to be normal. At times, I look enviously at my friends who have normal skin able to wear the nicest clothes. Here I am stuck with jeans/long pants to cover up my battle wounds so as to prevent people from commenting. I realised I am living in a different world. Not many people understand the world I am living in. Not even my parents. It is hard being someone with eczema. Sometimes when the flare up is so bad, I actually feel embarrassed that people have to actually put up with an eyesore like me. 

Dear God, I know You are reading this. I really pray that You will help me come to love myself and others. It is hard. I don't know why You allow this to happen but I really pray for Your guidance and understanding. Teach me what I should do to be healed. Father, I also pray for the person who is reading this post. I know it was not a coincidence that they are reading this right now. They might be looking for a cure or just an answer to the question that they may have. Father, I pray that You will touch their heart and provide the answer that they may be searching for. Thank you for sending Your son to die on the cross for our sins. I know and claim on the promise that by His stripes, we are healed. So father, I look forward to the day where I will be fully healed and clothed in Your righteousness, to become the beauty that You want me to be.

In Jesus' name we pray, Amen!

xoxo

Eczema Beauty