Topical Steroid Withdrawal

So it has been quite awhile since I updated this blog. I honestly must admit, I almost forgot the existence of this blog till today, I received an email notification of a comment from a fellow eczema suffer who has benefitted from what I have shared through this blog.

I know I have been away for a really long time. I have lots to update you guys. Basically, 391 days ago, I made the decision to completely stay away from steroids. It's called Topical Steroid Withdrawal (TSW). I realised that my skin NEVER got better whenever I followed the doctors' instructions to apply topical steroid.

It was journey of faith. Trusting that God will heal me. The first few months of TSW was hell. My skin was addicted to steroids and it was like withdrawing from a drug addiction. My skin felt like it was burning. It was red and raw. It is so easy to feel completely helpless and lousy about yourself in that state. I thank God that He has been faithful and good to me.

391 days later, my skin is so much more manageable. It has been the best I ever remember it to be. Eczema wasn't the problem. Steroids prescribed by doctors made it seem like a problem. There are many misinformed eczema warriors out there. I pray that they will be healed from eczema.

Dear Heavenly Father,

I thank You so much for always being there for me. For seeing me through the darkest seasons of my life. Father, I thank you for healing me and getting me through TSW. I pray that You will continue to empower me to boldly proclaim Your love and goodness in this dark and chaotic world. Father, I commit all the other eczema warriors into Your hands. Only You would know and understand the complete exasperation that we feel from time to time. I pray that You will strengthen us and help us through each day. Help us see ourselves in a way that You see us - Way beyond our skin.  Father, I pray that you will surround and bless each and every eczema warrior who may be searching for answers. May You reveal it to us in Your time. Thank You Father for this opportunity to share my life experience with the world. May it be a blessing to whoever who may come across this post.

In Jesus' Name we pray,
Amen!

Xoxo
Eczema Beauty

Oral Steroids

It's been awhile since I updated this blog. Well, there's just simply so many things to update on. So basically, I've been put on a dose of oral steroids because my eczema flared up pretty bad. Although the steroids are supposed to suppress the inflammation, they give other side effects such as mood swings, moon face, body aches... basically it messes with your body. At times I just don't feel like my normal self anymore and it's frustrating.

It frustrates me that I could not put all that I'm experiencing fully into words. Yes I find it so hard and I question God asking Him why He puts me through this. I'm physically, psychologically and emotionally exhausted.

Dear Heavenly Father,
I'm calling out to You. Only You know what I'm going thru right now. I pray for forgiveness for lacking in the faith. I pray that You'll deliver me and help me through. Only You know how much I want to be called back Home.  Father, help me seek You in this difficult time. I pray that even in this trial, You would use me and my suffering to touch the lives if other people.
In Jesus' name we pray,
Amen

Xoxo
Eczema Beauty

Back to School

So it's my first week back to school. I don't know if it's because my room in dorm is dusty or something. .. When I went back to hall, i felt terribly itchy. It might be because it's back to the stressful environment as well... That's one thing about eczema you'd never really know the exact cause of it.

The picture of me in pyjamas. It's sometimes called the wet wrap. It's basically the application of very thick moisturiser on skin followed by a layer of wet PJs and then a layer of dry PJs. It's really uncomfortable and time consuming :( It's times like these where I really wished I was normal but I guess I don't have not much choice as an eczema sufferer.

I think I've mentioned this before. But stress does soooooooooooooooo much harm to me. I realise how much my skin flares up when I'm stressed. Other than that, my skin flares up when I'm also on my period. :((

It's hard. I really wanna be normal. -cries-
Yes, just a random update for the new year.

Dear Heavenly Father, thank You for seeing me through the week. Even as I experience a flare up right now, I pray for healing and Your protection. May You heal me from within and give me the peace that the world can't give. If it's Your will,  take away the stress that I am experiencing and restore my skin to perfection that only You can give. Father, I pray for other eczema sufferers as well.  May You be with them and encourage them through the tough times. Let them experience You for themselves.  Thank You Father for sending Your only son to die for our sins. By His resurrection, there is power of forgiveness and healing. I claim on the promise and receive with outstretched arms. I pray for each and every individual that may come across this post. May You let them experience You in a personal and intimate way. Keep them in Your loving arms.
In Jesus' name we pray,
Amen

Xoxo
Eczema Beauty

Brokeness

Had a sudden flare up today after gym session. It was so itchy. I couldn't help but scratch and injure my skin. Normal people will never understand the trauma. They think eczema people want to scratch.  Correction, we can't help but scratch. In easier terms, we just can't help it. We're not like normal people.

I burst into tears. It's so hard. Where's the healing God promised?  I questioned. Why did God create me this way? Why can't I have normal skin? I have never had the courage to wear shorts or miniskirts for I have ugly skin. It's just so hard. I can't help but be envious of girls with flawless skin & limbs. I'm just this broken person with ugly skin...

Dear God,
I'm trying so hard to trust. I don't know what else to do anymore. The itch is just so unbearable. I know it is probably because of sin that i have to battle eczema. But Father, i believe and claim on the promise that Jesus died on the cross for me and His resurrection proves that He has overcome death. Eczema, pales in comparison and i believe that there is power in Jesus' name. Help me remember that. Heavenly Father,  I know at times I've disappointed You and I ask for forgiveness. Teach me to love you more so that I can love myself and then love others as well. Father,  I commit whoever reading this into Your loving arms. Grant them Your love & peace. Let them experience You personally.
In Jesus' name we pray,
Amen

Xoxo
Eczema Beauty

Inspiration for this blog

My skin has been flaring up quite badly. My face, knees arms and back of legs has been really red and inflamed.I don't know if it is the weather. Or just my skin being angry... 

It started out because of the stress from the exams. Now they would't just go away. :( I have been so helpless the past few days. Sometimes I even cry seeing there isn't much I can do to actually get rid of eczema. This inspired me to create this blog to rant, or even to share my experiences. I know God is real. But sometimes, I can't help but wonder what is He up to? Or why does He not want to heal?

I will keep holding on. 

It is hard being an eczema being. I actually feel less than a human being. I really want to be normal. At times, I look enviously at my friends who have normal skin able to wear the nicest clothes. Here I am stuck with jeans/long pants to cover up my battle wounds so as to prevent people from commenting. I realised I am living in a different world. Not many people understand the world I am living in. Not even my parents. It is hard being someone with eczema. Sometimes when the flare up is so bad, I actually feel embarrassed that people have to actually put up with an eyesore like me. 

Dear God, I know You are reading this. I really pray that You will help me come to love myself and others. It is hard. I don't know why You allow this to happen but I really pray for Your guidance and understanding. Teach me what I should do to be healed. Father, I also pray for the person who is reading this post. I know it was not a coincidence that they are reading this right now. They might be looking for a cure or just an answer to the question that they may have. Father, I pray that You will touch their heart and provide the answer that they may be searching for. Thank you for sending Your son to die on the cross for our sins. I know and claim on the promise that by His stripes, we are healed. So father, I look forward to the day where I will be fully healed and clothed in Your righteousness, to become the beauty that You want me to be.

In Jesus' name we pray, Amen!

xoxo

Eczema Beauty